Teachers understand that students do well when they can (Dr. Ross Greene). When a twice-exceptional or neurodivergent student is struggling, the behavior we see is often a signal—an attempt to communicate something they may not yet have the skills or language to express. These guiding questions are designed to help you look beyond the behavior and uncover what might be getting in the way of the student’s success. By approaching these moments with curiosity and empathy, we can better support each learner’s needs, strengths, and potential. Understanding the Student’s Perspective What might the student be trying to express through this behavior? Does the student have the words or skills to express their needs differently? How does the student typically respond to frustration, disappointment, or unexpected changes? What emotions might the student be experiencing right now? For example, are they: Frustrated by lacking needed skills to accomplish the task? Bored by work that is too easy? Anxious or embarrassed about academic performance or presenting in front of the class? Identifying Triggers and Patterns Are there specific times, locations, transitions, or activities when this behavior tends to happen? Have any recent changes in the student’s environment, routine, or relationships occurred? Has the student been exposed to ongoing stressors (e.g., social conflicts, academic challenges, sensory overload)?  What did I observe right before the behavior occurred? What other factors may have been impacting the student when they entered the classroom?  For example: Was there a stressful interaction in a previous setting such as recess or another class? Was there an unexpected or overstimulating event such as a fire alarm, substitute teacher, or change in schedule? Exploring Unmet Needs Does the student have any unmet physical needs (hunger, thirst, tiredness, discomfort, toileting, need to move, need for quiet)? Is the student feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or overstimulated? Is the student spending time each in an area of strength or interest? How can I incorporate those into their day? Could the student be seeking connection or reassurance from an adult or peer? Could something about the current context be exceeding the student's capability to meet expectations? For example: Is the work too difficult and requires scaffolding? Are they doing work on skills they’ve already mastered? Are they having trouble getting started due to executive function challenges? Are they having difficulty navigating the social interactions in group work? Reflecting on Adult Responses and Environment How do I typically respond when this behavior occurs? Are my expectations clear and developmentally appropriate for the student? Am I considering neurodivergent norms for communication and interaction (e.g. reduced eye contact, direct communication, literal interpretation, etc.)? Am I considering cultural / linguistic factors? Have I built a trusting and supportive relationship with the student? For example: Have I taken the time to connect about their strengths and interests? Have I tried to understand their concerns and problem solve together? Are there adjustments I can make to better support the student’s needs and communication? Finding Solutions and Supports Have I asked the student what they need? What strategies have worked in the past (or in other situations/environments) to help the student self-regulate? What additional supports or accommodations might help prevent this behavior in the future? How can I collaborate with the student to develop alternative ways of expressing their needs and what is the best way for me to communicate with them? Who else (teachers, family members, counselors) can provide insights into what might be going on and what helps? For more information, see the DEAR REEL Model: Kirigin, A., Joseph, K., Valek, Y., Wischnia, S., & Turk, C. (2024). The DEAR REEL model: Classroom strategies for twice-exceptional student success. REEL2e.         https://www.reel2e.org/dearmodel

➡️ TIP! To use, click the button above, then go to File > Make a Copy  to create a personal, editable copy of this spreadsheet. The Reframing Behaviors strategy grid is designed to help educators brainstorm classroom and school-level supports for students with a wide range of behavioral needs. The grid is inspired by the Multi-Tiered System of Support (MTSS), but it can be used in any school, regardless of whether the school uses MTSS. In this framework, there are three levels of support, ranging from supports for all students (level 1) to targeted support for a group of students (level 2) to intensive individual supports (level 3).* The grid applies the strategies recommended in REEL’s   DEAR REEL model  and expands them to consider how they might be implemented for students with varying support needs. It’s important to note that students may require more support in one area than in another, and that neurodivergent students may have   highly asynchronous profiles , where they are significantly behind their peers in certain skills, yet significantly ahead in others. This grid is designed to be a working document that teachers can add to and make notes on.  * While generally aligned with MTSS, the focus of the grid is on varied levels of support and does not necessarily imply small group settings at level 2. ➡️ TIP! To use, click the button above, then go to File > Make a Copy  to create a personal, editable copy of this spreadsheet.

Having a kiddo with lagging executive function skills (regulating behavior, setting and achieving goals, and adapting to new situations) can make parents feel especially powerless and panicked. But we parents are uniquely well-positioned to help build executive functioning (EF) skills. We are there during the more unstructured times when our kid is not in school or organized activities, and home life involves a thousand tasks that require EF skills. In the face of increasing demands on parenting, it can be hard to try to fit in “one more thing”, but improved EF can help our kid become more independent and reduce stress on the whole family. How to get your kid onboard Say you are on board with helping your kid develop EF skills, what if your kid is not? Every kid likely has something they’d like to achieve, and those are great places to start: Reach the next level in a game Post a YouTube video Make a special treat Meet up with friends Go on an outing to favorite place Earn money for a purchase How you approach your role as coach matters too. I try to come at it as “I am your executive assistant here to help you make your vision a reality” (who wouldn’t want one of those!) rather than “This is something you are bad at and I’m going to make you better at it”. I am also a big fan of Ross Greene’s Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS)  model that creates a problem-solving, collaborative partnership between adults and kids, and that engages kids in solving the problems that affect their lives. How to get started Our kids have their individual smarts, so we need to help focus their smarts on acquiring EF skills, and greasing the wheels of the learning process. Find one problem they’d like to solve, and help them experiment to find what works for them: Recognizing and articulating the problem Brainstorm strategies together Prompt them to try their chosen strategies And most importantly, shine a light on outcomes so they can use that information to adjust as needed (e.g. celebrate a week of homework-before-screens resulting in no catch-up work on the weekend, notice that putting Post-Its in the folder did not work because the folder does not get opened until class time) Alternatively, ask them what their goals are, be it pilot or ice cream truck driver (my kids’ picks), and tie EF skills to the needs of that goal. Initially, check-ins may need to be frequent, but should only take a few minutes a couple of times a day - perhaps in the morning, right as they get home, and towards the end of the evening. Strategies that have worked for us Many EF programs fail because they are rigid and cannot flex to accommodate our kids’ rainforest minds, so I am not going to tell you this is how you/your kid should do it, but these practices have been life-changing for my kid: Electronic devices are our friends Learning to use calendar apps and task/reminder/to-do apps in a way that works for their workflow For older kids, an email management process Set up accounts so you can view the content (e.g. shared logins or auto-forwarded emails), so you can provide timely scaffolding Physical reminders are our friends Checklists for morning, after school, evening routines posted at highly visible places Schedules posted on bulletin boards (we have those on bedroom doors as well as common area of house) Checklist for homework, chores, sports/activities, going out the door–whatever you collaboratively chose as goals or problems to solve Clocks in every room, clocks visible from every seat, clocks that chime every 15 minutes Modeling is our friend I’ve cultivated the eccentric habit of speaking my thoughts out loud to teach EF skills in a non-threatening way. E.g. “Okay, I have to go to back-to-school night at 7, and you are not back from soccer until 6, what are we going to do about dinner?” My kid will often jump in with very helpful advice! I make lots and lots of oopses all day long, these have been great opportunities to model flexibility and incremental improvement. E.g. “Oh shoot! I forgot to bring sunscreen! I’ll ask to borrow someone else’s, and make a note now  so I remember to put a bottle in the car later  so I never  forget again.” Data is our friend It’s not possible to evaluate how things are working without data to create a feedback loop, so look for easy ways to capture data (e.g. medication counter to log how often they are remembering to take their pills, step counter to see if planning to walk after dinner resulted in more steps, task tracker to see how many tasks got checked off) Call their attention to the results of their efforts in a completely non-judgemental way, like a scientist checking the results of last night’s experiment The book “ Smart but Scattered ” has a big collection of strategies organized by specific EF skills. Even if you don’t have time to read it cover-to-cover, flipping to the relevant chapter can give you lots of ideas. My favorite find recently is this gold mine of ADHD pro-tips  posted by folks with ADHD on Reddit. Closing thoughts Education experts have shown that learning happens in the zone between what learners can do on their own and what they cannot do–where they can do it with support and scaffolding. We need to let go of what our kids’ classmates/cousins/neighbors can do, and focus on where they are at. The corollary is to let them do it themselves once they can, even if it is easier and faster if we do it. Some say the goal of parenting is to work ourselves out of a job.

Every other month, we host a free Parent Support Group for families of twice-exceptional (2e) children in partnership with Parents Helping Parents (PHP). In our latest session, we had the pleasure of welcoming Lital, a longtime member of our private REEL 2e Google group. As a fellow parent, Lital shared her invaluable insights on prioritizing the next steps after receiving a new diagnosis or reevaluating recommendations for your child. It’s common to feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of recommendations for services, therapies, and appointments that come with a new diagnosis or evaluation. Everything can feel urgent as if it all “needs” to be done immediately. But Lital reminded us that trying to tackle everything at once isn’t always the answer. Instead, it’s an excellent time to sit down and ask some thoughtful questions about your family’s priorities and needs. This approach worked for her family and aligns with recent research published in JAMA Pediatrics  (June 2024), which found that increasing the intensity of interventions didn’t necessarily lead to better outcomes for children. Practical Ways to Approach New Recommendations Lital encouraged parents to slow down and ask thoughtful questions when deciding which services and therapies are truly the best fit for their child and family. To make the decision-making process a little easier, she categorized some important considerations that can help families think about “what’s next” from different perspectives. Valid Reasons for Saying “No” or “Not Now” You don’t have time (due to your job, family needs, or multiple kids) You don’t have the financial resources for all of it Your child isn’t interested or willing You don’t believe it will help, or you don’t agree with the goal or approach Bigger Picture Questions What are my family’s priorities right now? What are my own priorities right now? Which therapy is most urgent for my child at this moment? Am I addressing a short-term issue or planning for long-term development? Where do I envision my child and family in 5, 10, 15, or 20 years? What are the top five actions I can take that will likely have the most significant impact on my child’s progress? (These may or may not involve therapy) Questions to Ask Before Starting an Intervention What specific outcomes do I hope to achieve from this intervention? Is my child on board? Will they enjoy or tolerate it? Do I agree with the philosophy behind this therapy? Is it affirming to neurodiversity? How much time will it take, and will it require additional effort at home (exercises, reinforcement, etc.)? Is that realistic for us? Is it evidence-based? (For example, play therapy and vision therapy are not evidence-based for ADHD or autism.) Is there a clear treatment plan, and how will I evaluate progress? Is it covered by insurance? Are providers currently available, and how long am I willing to wait? For a deeper dive, explore Lital’s full slide presentation , where she provides additional questions to help guide your decision-making. Remember, our 2e Parent Support Groups are a great place to connect with others who understand the unique challenges and joys of raising 2e children in today’s world. Visit our Events  page to explore our upcoming speaker series and to register for the next 2e Parent Support Group, hosted by REEL 2e in partnership with PHP. We would love to see you there

A heartfelt thank you  to everyone who joined us for our inaugural K-12 Strengths Fair  on Sunday, March 9! The event was a huge success, with hundreds of attendees  exploring a variety of exhibitors, kids diving into hands-on projects, and parents connecting with one another while hearing from our incredible speakers. The energy in the room was unforgettable —families found a space to be themselves, celebrate their children’s strengths and interests, and engage with valuable resources. Exhibitors told us this was the most positive and engaged  audience they had ever encountered, and we loved seeing so many meaningful connections formed. But our favorite part?  Finally meeting so many of you in person  instead of through a small Zoom box! Hearing how REEL has touched your lives truly touched our hearts. What Attendees Had to Say: “Sam Young’s square peg in a round hole analogy was thought provoking, especially with the idea that you should sharpen your edges instead of sanding them down . I like the strengths-based approach to neurodiversity .” “Watching Gil's talk about dyslexia helped me ‘step into a dyslexic mind’ in a way that I have never been able to do before.  The way he celebrates and encourages his dyslexia inspires  me to see my students and children differently and for the better.” “Great event overall. Both kids had a wonderful time making connections and learning about programs they want to attend . What an amazing event and priceless connections we made. Thank you!” “It was such a pleasure to meet the REEL team and see so many other people I recognize from the online classes I have taken. The support and guidance I have received from REEL means so much to me and through me, to my family.  I am grateful for all you do.” Watch Our Keynotes Our keynote speakers got RAVE reviews! Check out the recordings for their insights and inspiration. Sam Young, " Neurodivergent & Strong, Developing our Superpowers " Gil Gershoni, " Neurodiversity Unleashed: Turning Dyslexic Traits into Tools for Success " Sam Young, " Supercharge Your Student’s Executive Function Skills: Practical Strategies for Success " Explore the Fair’s Strength-based Resources Browse our strength-based exhibitors  to find schools, camps, providers, and enrichment programs for your K-12 student. REEL Resources to Get You Started on the Strengths-based Path Use our strengths topic tool  to find past event recordings of our expert speakers and online articles all about supporting your child’s strengths. 8 Strengths Based Activities to Kick Off the School Year Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child - Seven Strategies for Success The DEAR REEL Model - Classroom Strategies for Twice Exceptional Student Success Maximizing Student Success - A Strength Based Pyramid Strengths Instruments to Help Identify Strengths We curated a list of strengths tools to help you identify children’s strengths and interests. Check them out here.  Montgomery Schools Neurodiversity Strengths Checklist Renzulli Grades K-5 Interest-A-Lyzer Renzulli Grades 5+ Interest-A-Lyzer Common Strengths of Gifted & Twice Exceptional Kids & Teens Strength-based Neurodiversity Books Here’s a list of our favorite books centered on the importance of centering strengths and interests in the lives of neurodivergent learners.  Neurodiversity in the Classroom: Strength Based Strategies Stand Out 2.0: Assess Your Strengths The Dyslexic Advantage Raising Twice Exceptional Children Divergent Mind Your Hidden Genius Schoolwide Enrichment Model: A How-to Guide for Talent Development To Be Gifted and Learning Disabled: Strength-Based Strategies Moving Forward The Strengths Fair was designed to connect families with resources that support a strengths-based approach to education. As we plan future events, we look forward to continuing these conversations and expanding access to tools that empower neurodivergent learners. Thank you again to all who participated, and we look forward to future opportunities to connect.

REEL recently hosted a private school panel featuring three parents, Abby Kirigin, Carmen O’Shea, and Callie Turk, who shared their journeys to find a good educational fit for their twice-exceptional (2e) children and families. The event also featured new resources from REEL on private schools in Silicon Valley. We present below the second of three blog posts that summarize the key takeaways from the session. The first blog post offered advice on key considerations when thinking about private schools for your 2e learner. ************************************************************ Essays. Recommendations. Tests. Shadow Days. Interviews. Projects. The Silicon Valley private school admissions process can be daunting. REEL’s private school parent panelists have applied to many schools over the years and offer these key pieces of advice. Talk to multiple people. Don’t rely on just one person’s experience or perspective to make your decisions. Conduct thorough due diligence because every child and family will have different needs. The information people share about their experiences with schools is personal. Plus, schools change over time, and it’s important to get up to date information. If you read online reviews, keep in mind that it is usually the most vocal and unhappy parents who post and, again, complaints from several years back may have been addressed—ask the admissions officer and parents currently at the school about past issues and how they’ve been resolved. Trust your gut. You are the expert in your child, your family and what will work for you. If your current situation isn’t a good fit, trust your instincts to look for a better solution for your child. Although Callie’s daughter started elementary school at a lovely, neighborhood school in the respected Palo Alto Unified School District, it was obvious by the end of second grade that her daughter wasn’t thriving. Most of Callie’s friends didn’t understand why they would consider leaving the school. But, as Callie shared, “We had to consider our options; our daughter was picking at her skin out of anxiety and was late to school at least 40 days in third grade—she just didn’t have an interest in going.” After exploring private school options, her daughter was offered a spot at a small private school with a mission to serve gifted and creative children. The school had smaller classroom sizes, opportunities to accelerate in areas where her daughter had strengths, and a more flexible and engaging curriculum; Callie and her husband knew it would be a better environment for their daughter, despite the tug to keep her at the local school with her siblings. Don’t wait to get evaluations. If you feel that your child is having challenges with learning, the panelists recommended having your child evaluated. Callie observed, “The more you know about your child, the better it is in terms of being able to understand what their true needs are.” If your local public school drags its feet and you can afford a private evaluation, the panelists encouraged moving forward, because the information from a comprehensive evaluation can reveal your child’s strengths, weaknesses, and needs—and may also be requested as part of a school application process. To disclose or not to disclose. Attendees asked if they should disclose their children’s learning differences as part of the admissions process. The panelists concur on the answer: “Yes.” As Carmen noted, “Disclosure is tricky. And I will definitely say we have been burned. But, I have always felt that the best way to go was to be pretty open about disclosing all aspects of our kids, their learning styles, abilities, and challenges. I have always disclosed my son’s ADHD diagnosis because I felt that it’s important for the school to understand. I’d rather they turn down our application than accept him and then ask him to leave a few months later because they say it’s not a good fit.” Abby echoed this same view: “Be upfront about your child and what their strengths are, but also all the other issues, so that both sides can evaluate appropriately whether this is going to be a good fit.” Ask if a school has openings—any time. Most schools in the Bay Area follow a standard admissions cycle, with applications due in early January and decisions posted by mid-March. However, schools can have openings outside of this cycle, and there is no harm in asking if you decide in April or May that you’d like to make a change for the coming school year. This has been even more true during the pandemic, when families have made last minute decisions to move or pull their children from private schools, leaving open spots for schools to fill. And even though the two most common “entry points” for private school once your child is past the elementary years are the sixth grade and ninth grades, schools often accept children at other grade levels. It never hurts to ask. Learn about financial aid. Many parents won’t pursue private school options because of the expense, but most private schools offer financial aid packages to families in need. It often is a core part of their mission and also required by their accrediting agencies. Callie observed, “if that’s your only barrier, it’s worth asking.” Inquire about flexible options . Panelists noted that some private schools are flexible about addressing a child’s discrepant strengths and weaknesses. For example, some will accelerate a child in math or let a child complete math elsewhere, such as a one-on-one school. Don’t hesitate to ask schools about the options for this type of flexibility. While the typical private school application process follows a few core steps—open house, shadow day, testing, recommendations, essays, and interviews—several changes are on tap this year because of the Covid-19 pandemic. Plus, some schools follow a different path or require additional submission materials. The best advice is for parents to check the individual websites of the schools to learn more about their admissions processes. Most Bay Area schools also use an online system called Ravenna ( www.ravenna-hub.com ) to manage the admissions process. Each school may alter their “normal” admissions process this year, including making tests (such as the ISEE) optional and requiring recommendations from your child’s teachers from last year as well as this year. One parent who attended asked about ways to manage the stress and confusion of the application process for her child. Abby advised that it is stressful, but that it helps to “Involve them, let them know that they have agency in the decisions, and that you are not going to make a decision without them. They’ll have the chance, even at the younger grades, to shadow and try schools out and then let you know what they think of them. We use a lot of calendars and spreadsheets, especially when they’re older, to keep them on track with where we are with each school, what’s coming next. If your child is feeling especially overwhelmed by the process, a good option might be to set a specific time during the week, say on Sundays, when you’ll talk about applications, and avoid talking about it the rest of the week.” Callie observed “So much of this is based on your child’s temperament. If you have a child who is more anxious, then maybe think about what the process is that you’re asking them to go through, because that’s a reflection of the school. We opted out of any school that had testing, high pressure interviews, or things that were going to spike my daughter’s anxiety.” Even in a test-optional year such as this one, consider how having standardized testing requirements in “normal” times is a reflection of the school and its culture. When thinking about the best school fit for your child, Carmen summarized: “It’s been a little bit exhausting and challenging at times. But on the other hand, I’m very grateful for the places we've gone to that have been able to work with our kids in positive ways. And I would say all of them have had their good sides and their downsides. It’s really about talking to the school, talking to parents, looking at multiple perspectives, and really using that information to make your decisions about schools.” Learn about specific private schools in Silicon Valley and beyond in our third post .

REEL recently hosted a private school panel featuring three parents, Abby Kirigin, Carmen O’Shea, and Callie Turk, who shared their journeys to find a strong educational fit for their twice-exceptional (2e) children and families. The event also featured new resources from REEL on private schools in Silicon Valley. We present below the first of three blog posts that summarize the key takeaways from the session. (See our 2e Fact Sheet for more info on what 2e/twice-exceptionality is all about.) ************************************************************ In a traditional year, the private school admissions process starts in the early fall; despite the daily disruption that the pandemic has wrought, fall 2020 is like any other—the private school exploration begins. In a year when many children have spent the majority of “school” learning from home, parents have observed and noticed more about their children than ever before. Many have wondered for the first time whether a private school might be a better choice for their 2e learners. To help parents navigate their options, REEL gathered a panel of three parents—Abby, Carmen, and Callie—with twice-exceptional and neurotypical children who have attended a range of private and public schools in Silicon Valley. All three families researched and switched schools when they realized that their current schools couldn’t address their children’s learning needs. In Abby’s case, a dyslexia diagnosis prompted her to look for schools that could better address her son’s challenges while also encouraging his gifts and strengths. Carmen searched for schools that kept her son engaged and active in learning, with more flexibility from teachers. Callie sought schools that gave her 2e, autistic daughter a greater sense of purpose in learning while also providing flexibility to help her manage her anxiety, which had started to present itself through skin-picking and school refusal. The speakers launched the panel with three key pieces of advice to help parents navigate whether a school—public or private—provides a supportive learning environment: 1. Fit. No one school will work for every child; it’s all about finding a school that is a good fit for your child and your family. Carmen shared, “At the beginning of all of this, we said, ‘Oh, we'll put the kids in the same school.’ We learned that wasn’t necessarily something that was going to work for our family. We really had to meet each child where they were and figure out what the best fit environment would be for them.” Callie, who has three children, including twin daughters, highlighted that when her girls were 8th graders looking at high school options, her 2e daughter initially felt like she should go to the same school as her brother and sister; however, “It just was not the right place for her. She even said to us, ‘Don’t you think I should go there? Wouldn’t that be easier for you all?’ And I said, ‘It won’t be easier for me if you’re not happy. It will be harder for me if you’re unhappy.’” Abby raised another consideration: “Commuting was definitely a factor. Does a school stand out enough to justify an extreme commute? How will you integrate commute time into your family?” 2. Flex. What works for your child this year may not be what works in the long-term; it’s okay to keep exploring to find what works for different stages of your child’s life. Abby switched her son to a new school that could offer more comprehensive support after his dyslexia diagnosis. Carmen moved her son several times to address teacher inflexibility. Callie told the story of realizing halfway through 7th grade that the school her 2e daughter attended might not be the best place for 8th grade. After looking at other options, the family decided to stick with their current school, which ended up working out because “The teacher that she had had so much trouble with really did change. She opened her heart to who Katie is as a person and a learner. And the year went much better. But we were glad we knew our options in case we needed to make a switch midyear.” 3. Fluid. Some of the schools that serve 2e children well are relatively new; others were founded just in the last five to ten years. School cultures change over time as they grow and mature. It can seem risky to join a school if you’re uncertain about its long-term funding and leadership. Every parent on the panel looked at start up schools and their children attended some of these smaller schools; their views on the risks of small schools changed over time. Carmen’s family did have to change schools a couple of times due to either teacher turnover or school closure. Reflecting back on start-up schools that Abby’s family didn’t consider initially, she remarked, “Knowing everything I know and having three children through so many schools, I would be comfortable with those environments now. But at the time, with a four-year old and no private school experience, we just felt those were too untested for us.” In addition, because young, small schools evolve, the perspectives shared by any one parent that has been part of the school’s community may not be representative of the school’s current situation. Talk to as many parents, staff, and faculty as you can to get a broad perspective on where the school has been, is, and may be going. All in all, the parents on the panel found that school culture and teaching approach have been the most important factors for supporting their 2e children. Teacher “fit.” Individual teacher interactions made a huge difference to the panelists’ kids year to year. Kind, patient, enthusiastic, and accepting teachers are the key to success—honoring the children as full people is critical. And this echoes back to the challenge of fit, flexibility, and fluidity—even within a school, the fit between the student and the teacher from year to year impacts the child’s ability to learn and grow. Carmen shared that her son attended a school with a Reggio Emilia approach that was more flexible in the earlier grades, “But started to get a little bit trickier as things got much more structured and traditional. He had a teacher who just wasn’t able to meet the needs of kids who were different. Our son’s self esteem plummeted rapidly.” After landing at two other private schools with teachers who varied in their abilities to flex with her son, the family had a positive experience at their local public school (see below). School culture and flexibility. Small classes, a close-knit community, access to teachers, and a whole child orientation are other key factors that panelists found helpful for their children and families. The panelists appreciated schools that have a culture of openness with easy access to communicate with teachers. Also, it’s important to look at schools that really honor children and who they are as people and learners. Look at how the school feels about the kids: Are the kids there to be molded and made? Pushed and driven? Or are the kids seen as people and as learners and as worth investing in? Ability to address specific needs. Panelists valued schools where the learning supports are built in, part of the culture and not something parents fight for. For instance, dyslexia requires specific approaches and should be well matched to the child’s particular needs. When Abby learned her 2e son is dyslexic, she explored several schools in the area that address the needs of dyslexic learners and was able to find one that could focus both on the remediation he needed as well as allow him to explore his strengths and interests. Carmen commented “My ADHD son needs a different kind of environment, more inclusive and accepting of his differences where he can talk and there are opportunities for collaboration.” The best schools for 2e learners also have flexibility built into their cultures, so that children can accelerate in areas of strength and receive support in more challenging areas. When public school works. It’s possible to find a good fit with teachers in public school as well. Sometimes, the public school really is the right place for a child; they are required to support kids with their learning differences. As Carmen noted, after a string of up and down experiences with teachers in private schools, her son switched to public school for part of third and all of fourth grades. Her son’s fourth grade teacher “blew away my stereotypes about public school not necessarily being a fit for a kid like this.” However, while the public school was better able to address her son’s ADHD challenges, “They weren’t as well-equipped to differentiate. With private schools, the differentiation potential is generally better.” One attendee mentioned that “even though there are plenty of stories about negative experiences in public schools, positive experiences are possible, you just may not be hearing about them. People who are in this field do care; they may be constrained by the resources available, but most do genuinely want to serve the kids.” With so many things to consider, Abby summed up the panelists’ shared experience: “Smaller schools often make more sense for 2e learners, or at least a school where you’ve got a strong community. Whether you choose public or private, it’s important to find a school that emphasizes kindness and empathy as their core values.” Learn about the panelists’ advice regarding the admissions process in the second blog post .

REEL recently hosted a private school panel featuring three parents, Abby Kirigin, Carmen O’Shea, and Callie Turk, who shared their journeys to find a good educational fit for their twice-exceptional (2e) children and families. The event also featured new resources from REEL on private schools in Silicon Valley. We present below the third of three blog posts that summarize the key takeaways from the session. The first blog post offered advice on key considerations when thinking about private schools for your 2e learner while the second blog post covered admissions process tips. ************************************************************ In preparation for REEL’s recent 2e private school panel, we compiled a list of Silicon Valley private schools with some topline information about what these schools focus on—gifted, 2e, learning differences, grade levels. You can review the list and suggest additions to it: https://tinyurl.com/REELPrivateSchoolsList . One attendee shared, “We consulted with a leading psychologist focused on 2e kids, and he said our kids are so unique there is not a perfect school, we need to focus on the least bad school option and supplement in areas that the school is not able to support.” Some parents mentioned they try to optimize their school choice based on the factors that are hardest for them to address at home. For example, they may select the school that best supports their child’s social skills, while opting to provide advanced math opportunities at home. Callie observed, “If there were a perfect solution for 2e kids in Silicon Valley, we would have told you in this session. So, as you go through the list of local schools, remember that this process really is about the fit for your family and balancing all the factors that you face.” Callie also highlighted the dedicated 2e schools across the country, many of which offer virtual options on an ongoing basis, noting, “I would look at those schools that offer remote options because they’re probably better set up to support 2e learners, and, in some cases, also explicitly designed for virtual learning.” It might surprise families that many Silicon Valley schools are unfamiliar with 2e or don’t specifically serve 2e students. 2e is a relatively new term to a lot of people, including educators. In fact, it is more common to find schools designed for twice-exceptional students in the East Bay. Additionally, some of the schools that you might expect to support 2e students, like those for the “gifted”, may not have the expertise on staff to address children’s learning differences. In preparation for the panel, Callie spoke with admissions directors from several local schools for gifted learners; all of them shared that they are not specifically set up for 2e learners. They do have 2e students because, inevitably, if you are a school that serves gifted students, you will have some 2e students. But it’s all about the fit between that child, that family and that school. All of these schools that serve gifted students encourage anyone who thinks that the school might be a good option for their child to reach out, as they evaluate children on a case by case basis. The panelists also recommended several resources to help Bay Area parents sort through their school decisions: Gifted Support Center (San Mateo) Parent Resource Advisors (Menlo Park) Tilt Parenting School Listings Teresa Nai r - thnairEd@gmail.com - works with families to chart an educational strategy (private, public, charter, home, virtual, alternative) REEL Google Group Email List (Post questions about schools to this group of 2e parents) Abby, Carmen, and Callie’s children have attended many schools, including Trinity School, Tru School, Encinal Elementary School, Synapse, Woodland School, Touchstone Learning, Helios, Woodside Priory, and Mid-Peninsula High School. They and many other REEL parents have explored and applied to many others. Please email hello@reel2e.org to learn more about parents’ personal perspectives on specific schools, recognizing that each parent and family will have a unique viewpoint based on their needs and experiences. In the end, whether you decide on public school, private school, virtual school, home school, or something in between, there are many options. The goal is to find a place where your unique child can thrive and grow. As Callie shared, “My daughter went from being someone who was a little bit of a problem, who didn’t want to get up in the morning, to being someone who got up every day and loved going to school.” We hope you find the educational option that helps your child get up and go!

TL;DR Parents of 2e learners often have trouble finding an ideal learning environment for their child. Should you stay in public school, try private school, homeschool, or try a unique school format? The answer is: It depends! On October 8, 2024, we heard from a panel of four parents about their experiences weighing school options for their children; each has 2e children who have attended various public, private, and home schools through the years. Local schools consultant, Lauren Meltzer, discussed client experiences and school search recommendations. We learned about the pros and cons of various learning environments, the signs it’s time to make a change, and the process of finding a good-fit school for your 2e learner.  A Framework for Fit Abby Kirigin, REEL’s executive director, kicked off the event by reviewing the DEAR REEL model , which provides a framework to explore whether a school may be a strong fit for your 2e learner. She provided specific questions from REEL’s recent article in Parenting for High Potential  to consider when looking at what a school offers in the context of developing connections, embracing flexibility, attending to strengths, and reframing behaviors. Check out the article  for all the details. The parent panelists then shared stories of their children’s paths through K-12 schools.  Lessons Learned through Breaking Points One parent shared the story of her two autistic ADHD sons and the twists and turns their education journey has taken. Each attended public school for a number of years, but their success hinged on a lot of parental involvement. Each faced a mental health breaking point: the oldest when he transitioned to a very large middle school, and the younger when he was placed in a situation with a poor fit between him and his teacher, principal, and the school campus. Both sons transitioned to a small, private, project based school where they thrived. One of the highlights of this new school is that it serves students in grades K-8, which she noted, “Keeps the environment young. They still have recess. Plus, the school provided great flexibility—the kids can walk around and pace to think.” However, she also observed that a less structured environment can feel chaotic to kids when they first transition from a traditional setting to a more open culture. Her older son recently chose a small but more traditional private high school. Unfortunately, this led to a second crisis when the school did not show understanding of neurodivergence or assignment flexibility. He is now at a 1:1 school. Each instance of pulling out required months of low-demand recovery time.  Based on her family’s experiences, she highlighted these lessons learned: You can make some environments work if you are able to invest a lot of time/resources and schools listen to you and are willing to experiment Trust your gut when it’s time to make a change; don’t be afraid to step off the “well worn path”  Environments may work for a time; but, as needs change, the environment may need to change There isn’t one school that will meet all of your child’s needs–prioritize what you need the school to provide vs what you can supplement outside of school The same school may not fit all of your children Be a good partner to your school Teach your child to self-advocate Try not to ride their emotional roller coaster (easier said than done!) Integrate strengths as much as possible into schools and at home Every Child is Different Another parent shared her experiences navigating the education system for her three children, who are all profoundly gifted; have ADHD, dyslexia/dysgraphia; and  are highly social. They each had unique school pathways. Her oldest spent the majority of his early grade years at a school for gifted and creative children, then homeschooled in 8th grade while the family traveled for a year. Her middle child moved from this same school to attend dyslexic specialized private schools, and is now at a traditional private high school with strong support systems. And then her youngest child has been at the same private school with an active learning support team since kindergarten. She emphasized, “Even if your children have the same profile, see your kids for who they are.”    Looking back on all her family has learned, she discussed the challenges of transitioning her children from one school to another, emphasizing the importance of finding schools that provide on-site resources and support, because “These kids are maxed out after a day at school, so I work hard not to have a lot happen after school. I want it to happen onsite.” She also highlighted the significance of living close to the school (“Driving around is a lot on parents and students”) and not underestimating the impact of missing milestones, such as graduations, if you pull a child out of a school earlier than you planned. Lastly, she stressed the importance of finding a supportive community of parents with twice-exceptional children. Her family had an unfortunate experience with her oldest child’s charter highschool; it imploded and her son had to finish out high school unexpectedly at a 1:1 school. The good news is he took a gap year to make a documentary in Kenya and is now thriving at film school in Southern California. When Homeschooling Works Out Despite the fact that “Homeschooling was not on my radar or agenda,” our final parent discussed her son's struggles in traditional public school and how they transitioned to homeschooling/online-schooling —and how surprised she is that they are “having a great go of it!”. She highlighted the benefits of their current online program, which offers a project-based, collaborative learning environment and provides support for her son’s ADHD and dysgraphia. She also mentioned that they use a public home school charter school (Ocean Grove) that provides IEP services for her son as well as accountability.  The mom discussed her son's experience with online schooling, highlighting the benefits of flexibility and interest-based learning. He wanted her to share that “I love learning this way. I’m able to dive deep into topics that interest me.” She noted the development of his executive functioning skills and intrinsic motivation, as well as his ability to take breaks and manage his time effectively. On the flip side, she also mentioned the challenges of balancing career and family life, and the need for intentional social connections.  She concluded by sharing her son's preference for home schooling, how it gave him his light back, and the possibility of transitioning back to an in-person environment for high school. She shared, “He’s a different child. He’s in a calm state. He had a lot of trauma before. It’s so good to have him back.”  Based on their experience, this mom recommended considering alternative environments for children who may not thrive in traditional settings. She said “There’s never one perfect environment. Even with homeschooling, we’re always adjusting every year. If you go this route, you have to make the leap on what we’ve been conditioned to think school looks like. It’s been an unexpectedly wonderful experience for our family.”  Think Outside the “Box” Our session closed with a presentation from local parent coach and school consultant for neurodivergent children, Lauren Meltzer . She shared her own experiences working with neurodivergent/2e children and their families, and emphasized the importance of understanding their unique needs and finding the right fit for them, rather than focusing on a specific school. Lauren encouraged parents to think outside the box and explore different options for their children's education, with options such as schools for twice exceptional children, gifted children, micro schools, 1:1 schools, online schools, and those with specific learning supports. Lauren stressed the importance of understanding the school's approach to the twice-exceptional profile by asking questions about things like classroom management, group work, sensory needs, the availability of support resources, and flexibility for the child's style. Lauren emphasized the need for research and networking with like-minded parents, and suggested visiting schools to get a firsthand experience. She mentioned that, in her own journey, she visited schools at drop off and pick up times to see their culture in action, including how families and educators interacted. In addition to checking if there are kids who might be a good social fit, she underscored the significance of a supportive parent community that embraces all kinds of kids. She noted, “I can’t emphasize how important the parent community is…if other parents have a ‘less than’ attitude about these kids, it will impact everything.”  Lauren highlighted the need for open communication with schools about a child's challenges and the importance of considering both their strengths and needs when considering a change in schools. She observed, “If a kid can never show their best self through strengths at school, it will be hard for them and they probably won’t find their people.” She suggests focusing on describing behaviors/needs rather than diagnoses if preferred. Lauren also discussed the challenges of applying for children with “behavioral challenges.” Many schools don’t accept children with externalizing behaviors, so it’s important to explain how you as a family work to address challenges and/or whether you feel they will not present in a “better fit” environment. There are schools who do accept children who struggle with externalizing behaviors and will work with the child on relevant skills and strategies. Lauren also suggested applying for financial aid for private schools, because people in the Bay Area can often qualify even with good salaries. She advised parents to be authentic and friendly during the application process. Wrapping Up Finding a good fit educational environment for a 2e learner can be tough - but when the child has the chance to be in a space where they can be more content and safe to learn, it’s a magical experience for everyone. If you would like more resources to help you on the journey, check out these options from REEL’s past private school panels. REEL 2e School’s List   REEL 1:1 School Consultation Lauren Meltzer School Consultant - Parent Resource Advisors , ​​pra4parents@gmail.com How to Evaluate Schools for Twice-Exceptional Learners: The DEAR REEL Model 4th Private School Panel notes  (2023) 3rd Private School Panel notes  (2022) 2nd Private School Panel notes  (2021) 1st Private School Panel notes  (2020) ----- TL;DR Understanding 2e Learners' Needs 2e children have both gifted abilities and learning challenges May struggle in traditional school environments not designed for their unique profiles Need environments that support both their strengths and areas of difficulty Social-emotional needs and feeling safe/accepted are crucial foundations School Selection Considerations Look for schools that truly understand and can support 2e learners Consider factors like class size, teaching style, available accommodations Evaluate fit for child's specific learning profile, interests, and social needs Be open to non-traditional options (e.g. homeschooling, online programs) Reassess fit regularly as child's needs may change over time Navigating the Application Process Be upfront about child's needs/challenges to ensure school can provide proper support Focus on describing behaviors/needs rather than diagnoses if preferred Highlight child's strengths and what they can contribute to the school community Ask detailed questions about 2e support, accommodations, teaching approaches Supporting 2e Children Through School Transitions Involve child in decision-making process, especially for older students Use shadow days or meetings with current students to explore options Frame as opportunity to find better fit rather than failure of current school Be prepared to make multiple transitions as needs change Supplementing School Experience May need to provide additional support outside of school (e.g. tutoring, therapies) Look for ways to nurture strengths and interests if not fully supported at school Build in opportunities for social connections if lacking at school Next Steps Evaluate current school fit using provided criteria and questions Research alternative school options in your area that may better support 2e learners Consider consulting with 2e education specialists for personalized guidance Connect with other 2e parents through organizations like REEL for support and advice

Ever wonder why your brilliant child struggles with seemingly simple tasks? If you're a parent of a twice-exceptional (2e) child, you know this feeling well. It's a common question in our community, and the answer often lies in executive function overwhelm. It's not about "dumbing things down" for 2e kids; it's about finding an accessible "way in" that aligns with how their unique brain operates. This video dives into the power of scaffolding – not as a crutch, but as a bridge that connects your child's strengths to challenging tasks. We illustrate this with a common morning routine struggle and show how identifying executive function challenges (like working memory and task initiation) and leveraging strengths (like being highly visual and thriving with autonomy) can lead to breakthroughs. Learn how a simple visual checklist can shift dynamics, build confidence, and foster independence. Ready to try this at home? Download our "Can We Figure Out a Different Way?" worksheet to identify a repeatable challenge, examine it through an executive function lens, and brainstorm strength-based solutions. You might be amazed at how quickly the tone can shift when the support truly fits your child. Get your worksheet here: https://www.reel2e.org/post/ef-tasks-can-we-figure-out-a-different-way Find more resources and join our community at REEL: www.reel2e.org Expand to See Transcript Hi! I'm Teresa from REEL. If you've ever found yourself asking or thinking "they're clearly smart, so why is this so hard for them?", you're not alone. This question comes up all the time in our small group discussions and within the community of parents of twice exceptional kids. And often the answer might involve executive function overwhelm. The answer isn't about ability. It 's about accessibility. 2e kids don't usually need things dumbed down. They need a different way in. They need a path that actually works for how their brain operates. That's where scaffolding comes in. Not to rescue or replace effort, but to build a bridge, something that connects the tasks and the child's strengths. In our workshops, we talk about what that can look like in everyday life, and we created the Can We Figure Out a Different Way, worksheet , to help with this process. Here's an example. A parent shares with us that their child could talk all day about their favorite animals, build incredible Lego models from memory and more. But every morning getting out the door was a complete battle. The routine was the same every day: get dressed, brush teeth, pack bag. But it never happened without reminders, arguments, and running late. Together, we looked at what executive function challenges or struggles were at play and seemed to be holding the child back. First, we decided to focus on working memory. This child couldn't hold on to all the steps, especially when there were distractions. Second, task initiation. Starting the 1st step often seemed to feel overwhelming, especially without structure. But we also looked at the child's strengths. They're highly visual and loved making signs, drawings, and comic strips, and they thrive given autonomy. And this is when they get to decide about the tasks and their order, it helps them feel confident and in control. So we brainstormed, stormed scaffolds built on those strengths. They created a visual checklist of their morning steps, with drawings that they made themselves, one drawing per task. Each task was a magnet, and every morning they chose the order, giving them control over the sequence without changing the goals. And eventually the parent will only ask once, what's your 1st magnet today? However, depending on your child and the situation, parental support and scaffolding may need to gradually be removed over time. That simple scaffold, visual, flexible strength base can completely shift the dynamic. The child can start initiating their own, and the chaos can drop, and they may feel more confident and independent. And that's what scaffolding can do. Not just help the child complete the task, but help them feel capable of doing it. So if you'd like to try this at home, download the Can We Figure Out a Different Way worksheet. Think of one frustrating moment in the day. Not the biggest one, just a small, repeatable challenge and keep it simple. Use the worksheet to look at it through the lens of executive functioning challenges and struggles along with your child's strengths. You might be surprised at how quickly the tone can shift when the support fits your child. It 's not just supporting executive functioning. We're building confidence, connection, and momentum. Don't forget there are many more resources at REEL and join our community to brainstorm more. You 're not alone on this journey. Thanks for joining us. Read more about this topic EF Tasks: Can We Figure Out a Different Way? Executive Function in 2e Learners Strengths and EF Struggles 2e Map 2e Executive Function Vocab and Focus Areas Cheat Sheet Strength Based Scaffolding for Executive Function Skills

REEL and the Landmark College Bay Area Success Center co-hosted an online event for Bay Area college counselors to learn top tips for supporting neurodivergent students through the college search and selection process. Success Center Executive Director Sandra Fishler set the context for the discussion. REEL Co-Founder Callie Turk shared the parent perspective. Landmark College students Daniel and Talia shared their personal experiences. See the transcript here: Callie Turk: Welcome to our conversation today about neurodiversity in college and tips for effectively supporting uniquely wired students and learners. My name is Callie Turk. I'm the co-founder and board chair of a nonprofit organization, REEL. I'm so excited to be joined today by colleagues from Landmark College Success Center and Landmark College, who will be talking to you about this important topic. We'll be sharing Sandra's perspective as the leader of the Success Center about helping kids be ready for college and just a lot of great background information on neurodivergent learners. Then, I'll be sharing the parent perspective. Daniel and Talia will be here to share the student perspective and also here to answer questions along the way. What we're going to do is go through just this little welcome here, and I will tell you a little bit about how this came to be. Then, we will have Sandra talk about traversing the college search. I'll do the parent perspective. Then, we'll have the student perspective, then open Q&A. Please just put your questions in the chat. We'll be monitoring that as we go through, probably saving most of the questions till the end, unless it's something we really need to address urgently right away. We do have some pre-submitted questions that were really great, so appreciate everyone for the thought you put into this. Just to give you a little background about who REEL is and why we wanted to host this session with our friends from Landmark Success Center: We are a Silicon Valley-based nonprofit. We really support families and educators of both neurodivergent and twice-exceptional learners and help them thrive in school by raising both their family's awareness and their educators' awareness of how to work with them, using research-based strategies and programming. For educators, we're providing resources, workshops, and all kinds of programs so that twice-exceptional learners and neurodivergent learners can be successful. With families, we are providing support groups and organizing and disseminating events and tools to help parents really help their kids. This whole session came out of an educator engagement that we had with a school in San Francisco that was really putting a year-long emphasis on doing a better job of supporting their neurodivergent learners. When we were talking to them about the kind of work we could do, they were mentioning that their college counselor, in particular, had been looking for resources to do a better job supporting neurodiversity but wasn't really having a lot of luck finding what they were looking for. I thought, "Well, we could do something about that." So, if we can do something about that, let's do something about that. Let's get some more information out to college counselors in Silicon Valley so that they can be supporting their neurodivergent students in this process. I couldn't think of anyone better to partner with on that than Sandra from The Landmark Success Center. She'll be talking more about what they do, but they are really working all the time with kids who are on this journey and their families. They're seeing it from that perspective, as well as being part of a college that supports students who are neurodivergent. She just has such an immense set of wisdom to share about this process. I reached out and said, "Let's do it," and she said, "Yes, let's," and so here we are today. Some of you may be wondering—I keep using this term twice-exceptional , and you may not be familiar with that term. We like to use anytime we have a chance to talk to educators just to expand awareness of twice-exceptionality. Sandra is going to talk a lot about what neurodiversity means. Within neurodiversity, there's a profile of a learner that has both distinguishing strengths and complex challenges. They may have been identified as being dyslexic or having ADHD or being autistic. They may not have been identified as those things yet. Very often, they are misidentified or not identified because they may also have some distinguishing strengths—some high ability or potential in one or more areas. They may know everything about World War II, be able to write amazing poetry. They may be ahead grade level in reading, but they can't write anything. So, they're very complicated students because everyone is expecting them to be able to do a lot more academically than they may actually be able to perform. Sometimes, those distinguishing strengths and complex challenges mask each other, and they combine and interact in very different ways, making them very unique learners and often some of our most confusing, perplexing kids. But many of them would like to go to college and have opportunities to pursue education in their areas of interest. We want to make sure that nothing holds them back. So, we don't want any neurodivergent student to ever be held back from what they want to do in their lives. We like to just make sure people know that there are these twice-exceptional kids out there who may not have been identified yet as having a learning difference or may have been identified as having a learning difference but haven't been seen for their full strengths. That's sort of what we mean by twice-exceptional . I've already explained to you why this session, and I'm going to hand it over to our friend Sandra from The Landmark Success Center, who is going to give us an overview of neurodivergence. Sandra Fishler: Thanks so much, Callie. It's really a pleasure to be here today, collaborating, of course, with the REAL 2E team and Landmark College Success Center. I'm going to go ahead and share my screen now. I do have some thoughts to share with you today. All right. I think Callie mentioned this before, but once again, we're here today to discuss traversing the college search—what might that look like? Again, it's a pleasure to be here today with Callie and the other participants from Landmark College. These are current students who are going to share their journey with us. My name again is Sandra Fishler. I'm the Landmark College Success Center Director. I'll tell you a little about Landmark College for some of you who may not know. For some of you, it might already be review, but Landmark College has been around about 40 years, educating students who are neurodivergent and doing it quite well. We are in our 40th year this year and celebrating an anniversary. About four and a half years ago, they decided they wanted to have some representation here on the West Coast post. So, The Landmark College Success Center was born out of that concept. We have a team of learning specialists who provide executive function coaching, academic support, college-level reading and writing skills, transition skill-building, skills to and through college, as well as social pragmatics workshops through the PEERS Concepts and curriculum. PEERS standing for the Program for the Education and Enrichment of Relational Skills. Here's my contact information if anybody needs to reach me—please feel free to contact me. As Callie mentioned, you'll get a copy of this presentation. We'll start off with a quote from Albert Einstein. He shares that, "Everybody is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." My guess is that you probably have a couple students feeling a lot like a fish trying to climb a tree when they think about entering this college search process. Let's go over a couple terms first. The first being neurotypical . This is what society may consider neurotypical—as being the typical brain development with cognitive and intellectual functioning associated with thinking, behaving, and processing information. Neurodivergent is what society may consider atypical brain development, cognitive functioning—an individual diagnosed with dyslexia or dyscalculia or ADHD or those 2E individuals that Callie was mentioning earlier. What is neurodiversity ? Neurodiversity is all of us. All brains function differently. This diversity, of course, is natural and beneficial to us as the human species. These differences should be accepted and viewed not as something that needs to be fixed but rather something embraced. Changing the conversation to help our students recognize and acknowledge those strengths is the beginning of the process to heading off to college. Let's put this into context. What are the prevalence of students with learning differences? You all work with students of all different abilities, so you probably know this quite well. One in five students have a learning difference, as reported by the National Center for Learning Disabilities. One in 15 have an IEP. One in 42 have a 504, but we all know that there are still millions that are undiagnosed. Let's talk about graduation rates. Graduation rates for the neurodivergent college students remain lower than the neurotypical students. There's about 49% of students with disabilities—again, those I described earlier with diagnoses such as autism, ADHD, 2E students as well—49% are completing their college programs. This is in contrast to what has been reported by Best Colleges as the general graduation rate at a four-year university or institution at 62%. What might be some of the barriers to that persistence? I'm sure many of you are already thinking—you have some in mind. There might be limited access to supportive resources—that could be one something holding a student back, possibly. Faculty and staff work so hard, and we want to recognize them, but it could be that maybe they don't have sufficient training in working with the neurodivergent student. There might also be some reluctance from students to disclose their neurodivergent status—maybe fear of stigmatization or just lack of awareness of what they may need should they disclose. The path begins with self-knowledge. As an education professional, these are ways that you can help. First, helping your young student find that self-awareness related to their strengths and identifying those areas of challenge and understanding their identities and their diagnosis. Fostering recognition of supports that might be available at the college that they're planning on going to or planning to apply to. Maybe they're entering a gap year program—recognizing supports there or even just the work environment and what might be recognized there. Encouraging participation in programs to help students better understand their LD and articulate what it means and learn the strategies to support it. Lastly, helping your young students strengthen their ability to articulate their LDs to others. Maybe even offering an opportunity for them to role-play with you to help build their confidence in expressing and articulating. They may want to consider disclosing. As they build that confidence in articulating, some things to consider: Unlike high school, a college will not know about a student's LD unless specifically told by the student. According to the National Special Education Advocacy Institute, undergraduates who wait until after their first year in college to request accommodations were three and a half times more likely not to graduate within six years. Imagine additional cost associated and just diligence and determination needed from the students. Also, considering that students don't outgrow their disabilities. Maybe many of you educators know this already, but oftentimes, students think, "Well, that's how I was in elementary school and high school—I don't have that anymore headed off to college." Again, you don't outgrow your disability; you learn how best to work with your strengths and addressing your challenges. Let's look at some of the legal drivers and compare what may be driving the secondary education experience and what might be driving the postsecondary education experience. The secondary education experience—IDEA, or the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act, is the driver. Success and reaching targets are paramount to the IDEA Act. Schools take the lead—they identify and provide intensive supports. Parents are encouraged and are often the advocate for their young student. Often, teachers and staff are all aware of a student's disability status. That, in comparison to the post-secondary educational experience, or college: What takes over there with the driver is the Americans with Disabilities Act, or ADA. Access is guaranteed, but success is not. That's an interesting distinction to make. Students assume the primary responsibility for their education and must self-advocate. Only instructors a student notifies will be aware of their status. The IEP and 504 plans have no legal weight. The Section 504 of Rehabilitation Act 1973 prevents discrimination, but again, the 504 plan doesn't have any legal weight in the post-secondary environment. No institutional accountability or monitoring is there. When looking again at these two, comparing them both—the legal drivers: IDEA in the secondary educational environment, success is the target, and most schools are aware of the student needs. In the postsecondary educational experience, ADA is the driver—access is guaranteed but not success, and the students have to lead the disclosure and must be an advocate for themselves. In looking at potential schools or identifying your students' needs and the school that might best suit those needs, let's look at a few options. The first one is a school that would be ADA-compliant. This is a school that meets the ADA requirements. There may not be any additional cost associated. There would be a small number of staff devoted to the neurodivergent student who has disclosed. There might be academic centers for writing, possibly math. There might even be a reading center. It's peer-based tutoring for the intro courses, and likely, once again, the student must advocate for services. Who does a fantastic job in this arena is the community colleges that we have around us—and we have some amazing ones in the area. Then, there are those that might be ADA-compliant plus. These are colleges, universities, institutions that go beyond ADA requirements. They may still not have a cost involved. There might be a slightly better student-to-staff ratio. Likely, there are peer-based, possibly professional academic coaching that would be offered. Once again, the student must advocate for the services. Some examples of these, even locally in the area, are the LINK Program at Cal State East Bay and the Wayfinders Program at Cal State Fresno. Then, we move on to a little bit more of a structured program, and these are IND programs that are offered, offering individualized services. Maybe they are fee-based. They tend to be more comprehensive with academic tutoring and skill-building support. There is likely a full-time, specialized staff. The programs generally ensure services with not as much student advocacy required. There's some fantastic private colleges that do this in the area. St. Mary’s College has their Connect Program, and there's the SALT Program at Arizona State University, or ASU. Then, there are a couple of LD colleges to consider. The first important item that they might have is full-time support staff. A comprehensive academic, social, pragmatic, and executive function support program. Likely, there are no additional fees—it would be all rolled into the cost. An example of this, of course, is Landmark College, as I described it earlier, but there's another one as well. Landmark College is a beautiful, bucolic environment in Vermont—Putney, Vermont, in fact. There's another one, Beacon College, which is located in Florida, and they have a little more of an urban experience, whereas Landmark College has research alongside the education. If your student decides they do want to disclose to the disability services office at the school they are considering, let's look at what those offices might be called because it can be a bit confusing, but they all generally address the same thing. Here—"What's in a name?" I think that was said by William Shakespeare—but oftentimes, it's called a Disability Support Services office or an Accessibility Resources office. I've got lots of other names here for you to choose from—whatever might work for any particular school. To make it a lot easier on your student, you can search the school's website and type in "disability," and you'll find out the name of that particular school's Disability Services office. Aside from deciding to disclose to the disability services office, other supports on campus should be considered in the student's application process as well. Looking at whether or not the school has tutoring services or study skill workshops. Maybe some sort of academic coaching, such as maybe a Writing Center or even some reading supports. Do they offer assistive technology? That can be very helpful to a neurodivergent student having difficulty either reading—maybe they need some sort of text-to-speech assistive technology. So, looking at possibly having some assistive technology as part of the school. Maybe some mentorship programs or honor societies that might be important to the student. Of course, looking at support groups such as counselors and advisors. Not forgetting about social programming and clubs—maybe sports associated. Then, looking to the orientation services to identify and share where to find all of these different departments on campus. Then, the last one there is the dining services. Oftentimes, this is overlooked because students don't consider this as a support, but if somebody does have dietary needs, the dining hall can provide support there oftentimes. Let's switch gears a minute. A very famous neurodivergent author, inventor, and advocate is Temple Grandin. She shares that, "The world needs all kinds of minds." Important to note: Oftentimes, the neurodivergent student has some executive function challenges—not all, but many. To that end, considering executive function support is something every student should consider—those that are challenged with executive function, I'll say, should consider. Executive function is the management system for the brain. Zelazo, Blair, and Willoughby offer that it can be defined as an attention-regulation skill needed for conscious, goal-directed problem-solving. So, you need to be able to identify your goal and problem-solve to reach that goal—executive function. If someone's having difficulty in executive function, what might that look like? If someone is challenged, it might be an individual having trouble managing their time or starting or completing projects and tasks. I'm sure you've come across many neurodivergent students who have completed their homework, and it sits in their backpack—they haven't turned it in. That's an important task to work on. Maybe having difficulty prioritizing those tasks—what's more important than others. Following directions, maybe having difficulty with the rules and routines. Maybe difficulty organizing tasks or thoughts or even having trouble planning for those long-term projects. We had a recent client of ours at the Success Center who was in college for visual arts, and she was really challenged with studying her notes from her classes—from the classes with lectures. What the learning specialist did was help her to pull those concepts together and map them out visually so she could learn the tasks that way. Again, that's something with planning—you can scaffold the tasks needed to reach that long-term project. I identified supports that you'll find on campuses, but oftentimes, families consider a team outside of the school as supports. Executive function coaches can be a good place to start. Again, the Success Center does that, but there's many others out there that do a great job. Something for a young student to consider—maybe they're looking at a life coach who can help them identify goals and reaching those goals. There's also independent living trainers out there for that college student that isn't quite ready to manage all of their independent living skills. There are trainers out there that can provide that support. Even peer mentors can be a guide on campus for that young person as they consider transitioning onto whatever school they decide to attend. Then, of course, incorporating therapists as needed. We at the Success Center work in concert with any number of these individuals to support our clients. We encourage that any support that is found is done from a strength-based model. Strength-based models are ones that emphasize the positive aspects of the student's effort and achievement, as well as what their strengths are. I mentioned a moment ago the project that was mapped out—or, excuse me, the lecture that was mapped out in the form of visual aids for an individual. That's a way of building upon an individual's strengths and addressing their challenges. More specifically, strength-based is taking what a student possesses as a strength, leaning into that, and then addressing challenges from there. Lopez and Lewis offered this description. How best can you, as an education professional, help prepare your students as they consider putting together a roster of schools and trying to figure out what might work best for them to ensure a successful transition? One of the first things is: How can you help your students articulate their needs and identify those colleges and transition programs to apply to which more closely matches their needs? What might be some open-ended questions that you could ask your students so they may better prepare their list of possible schools? This is just one sentence stem here: "Tell me about what kind of environment you like to be in. Is it a large environment like a city, or do you prefer something outdoors?" That's just one example. Consider helping with their homework submission, their paperwork submission to the disability services office. Remind them that they are the expert on them. Helping them to understand that they have to advocate for themselves—they are the expert. Then, as they look to develop that list of schools, what might be on that list addressing their student learning needs? That's one of the items that should be on their list. Identifying what environment, again, is—and many of these you're already doing with your students; these are just in addition to if you're not doing this already. What kind of degrees are offered, and what might be desired? What kinds of support centers are on that campus? That is really an important factor when you consider the student's learning needs. What clubs could be related to their major or their interests? Again, building their transition to be positive so they can find people—like people with their interests. Then, of course, considering their social interaction—what kind of groups might be there that have some common interests? Again, preparation and consideration, of course, makes for a better first-year transition. I mentioned a moment ago about providing open-ended questions, which I know many of you do this already. What you'll find on the screen here—and again, you will get a copy of this presentation—these are some sample questions that you could use. For instance, if you wanted to inquire about what sort of support services one of your students was interested in identifying, you could ask something such as, "What types of academic support services are you looking for?" Maybe in terms of transition support: "What type of transition support do you think you will need as you move from high school to college?" You'll get a copy of these, and you might find these helpful and add them to your arsenal of questions you likely are already asking your young students. I want to thank you all for being here. Thank you, of course, to the participants. My name is listed once again here along with my contact information, and I will turn it over to Callie. We can't hear you, Callie. Callie Turk: Thank you. Thank you. You think after all these years we'd be better at that, but thank you. Always learn something new when I listen to you go through information. On that note about having access to the slides, I want to make sure—while I'm introducing myself a little more here—that everyone out there knows you can actually access a Padlet that I put together that has direct links to the slides today, as well as some of the resources that we're covering. While I'm introducing myself briefly in terms of being a parent and giving you the parent perspective, feel free to use the QR code or directly enter that Padlet information if you'd like to access that. We will also include it in the follow-up email for today's presentation so that you can find everything really quickly and easily that you need. I'm just going to take a few minutes to share the parent perspective. I think you'll hear a lot of common themes from what Sandra said, but I really want to get to our students and let them have a chance to share their voices. I'm going to go pretty swiftly through my slides, but know that I am happy to talk to anyone in more detail about these if you'd like. I didn't make like really pretty slides—I just wanted to make sure I covered all the key points quickly and swiftly and that you would know that these points exist on these slides. In addition to co-founding REAL, I am the parent of three young adults, one of whom is an autistic first-year student in college. We just recently went through the college application process, and I wanted just to share some of the insights. Sandra, can you confirm that you hear me smoothly because my video looks a little herky-jerky? Okay, good. Thank you. I just wanted to say a little bit about how we helped create the college list for our daughter. We talked about her interests a lot—so, sort of to the point that Sandra was making about being strength-based, it's also really important, especially with our neurodivergent kids who tend to have stronger interests that are really driving their passions, to really lean into those. That really helped guide a lot of the criteria that we were looking for in schools. We also spent time reflecting on her past experiences and programs she had been to, so that really helped her think about what kind of environment she wanted, what was going to work for her or not work for her. We also met with a private college counselor just a couple of times who had a really deep knowledge of these kinds of programs and accessible education at colleges. That really helped because she really knows those college programs really well. You can sit with her for just an hour or two and talk about what your interest and needs are, and she really was able to sort of narrow down a really good list for us so that we weren't trying to search 2,000 colleges but really more like 20 to 30 colleges. We talked a lot about the criteria that would be important to her. Some of the things that Sandra mentioned—which, I mean, my twice-exceptional daughter who I'm talking about now, she's a twin, so we were doing the same kinds of things with her other sister, who is not neurodivergent, but it was just a really different—it had a different tone to it because her neurotypical sister was able to process a lot of this on her own. She was able to pick up a lot of information just by looking at websites and things, but also, she was just a little more flexible about what she wanted. Whereas, we knew our autistic daughter was going to have more specific interests and needs, so the size of school, the weather—like, she just all said, "I do not want to be somewhere sunny; I don't want to be anywhere sunny," because she doesn't do well with a lot of bright light. Those kinds of considerations were really important, and for her, really important that the school had a feeling of a "warm hug"—like a place where she was going to be really taken, you know, really looked out for and cared for. The college tours were hard but really essential. My daughter isn't one who likes to be on a plane and go a lot of places, but she really learned a lot. The first couple of tours, she was very closed off; she wouldn't want to ask questions, but she was gaining a lot of information we reflected on later. By the third or fourth tour, she knew more what was happening, and she was much more engaged—just a lot of research. I think it's a tendency for college counselors in high school to start trying to have put more on the students because they are going to have to go and self-advocate and be independent. But there is still really a strong role for parents to play in this process, potentially, depending on the child and their temperament and their energy level. So, some parents may be doing a little more of that research than is typical, but that's like a real partnership between them and their child based on what that child is kind of managing—being a senior and taking harder classes and thinking about college. Just a little more flexibility there—that that parent may be doing a little more of that kind of background legwork than other kids' parents may be doing. What really helped us the most was our school counselor. I know a lot of you are school counselors, and I cannot emphasize how important your role is. Our daughter really trusted her school counselor, and that made it so much easier for them to work together. A lot of neurodivergent kids haven't had great experiences working with adults in school environments all the time, especially by the time they've gotten to high school. Any adult that they can really build trust with is someone they're going to really value and open up to. To be that trusting adult in their life, I think, was just hugely valuable. Again, that external college counselor who really helped us with the list. Our school actually offered a one-week summer course on essay writing. It was part of their like normal offerings of summer, and that made a huge difference because these kids were working on the essays with teachers they trusted and with the college counselor they already knew. It really got her so far ahead so that once school started, she really had that personal statement pretty much done. All the websites that colleges offer on accessible education—kind of to Sandra's point—do those web searches and make sure kids are really looking at what's offered. Then, doing an interest-based summer college campus program. We did one—she did one between her junior and senior years where she got to go onto a campus and live there for a week or two and really do an interest-based activity but also experience: What's a dorm like? How do I get food in the cafeteria? A lot of neurodivergent kids have food sensitivities, and so just for her to gain that confidence that she could do that and navigate all that was huge. My top tips for success: Really get the testing accommodations early. That's a process—both the ACT and SAT will offer those accommodations, but you've got to ask for them in enough time. But also, don't stress that much about the test. I think, you know, some neurodivergent kids—yes, are going to go to top-tier schools, and they need to focus on those test scores, and some are not, and it's okay. Like, they don't have to have the perfectly manicured package for all the schools they may apply to and be interested in those places that may be the "warm hug" for that child. So, yes, make sure that we don't put—we don't have the kid not be able to do the test, but also, maybe don't stress about them as much. Really, really find a way to gather the student's input on the schools that are working for them. This may be non-traditional—so, like for my daughter, I created a Google Form. I don't know if it's going to open it up for me or not, but I think I put it in the Padlet. For my daughter, like having a Discord chat actually worked really well—that's how she liked to communicate about this, so I set up a Discord identity, and that's how we communicated. Some kids might want to do voice notes and not carry a journal. My neurotypical girl had a journal, and she wrote everything down—that is not going to work for everybody. So, really aligning to what works for that child and how they like to communicate is really important. To be patient and be flexible. There are going to be moments where whatever you're trying just isn't working, and there's just—we reach these breaking points, and really use that collaborative problem-solving—talk to the child, figure out what would work better. Again, just ground as much as you can in the child's interests and their goals, and that should drive the process. Common myths we ran into along the way that I want to dispel if possible: There are loads of schools out there, and they don't require the most rigorous course load. I feel like in Silicon Valley, there's this tendency to put a lot of pressure on kids to have the most rigorous course load, the most pristine record, to have everything lined up, and that is just a myth. You can lean into interest in your course selection. This really reinforces that story of who the child is, and we found schools really were much more interested in that than whether that child had taken the most selective course load. Most schools want these kids to be themselves. Most colleges we found really do want to help students, and they're really open about accommodations. We heard a lot of people say, "Well, you won't get those accommodations in college," or "You won't—no one will do this X, Y, or Z for you," and it's actually, like, not true. We found colleges were actually willing to have those conversations a lot more, even if you have to self-advocate with your professors. If that college isn't, then it just may not be the right college for your student. I think you have to, as a parent, acknowledge that. Students really don't have to spend the first two years taking general courses that they're not that interested in. You can go to colleges that let you start taking classes in your interest area right away. I think that's really important for these kids to know because sometimes school has been a real drag for a long time, and we can really get them excited about college when they realize they can take classes that are super interesting and they really do. Many colleges want to support neurodivergent students, but I would say just a lesson learned on our part is: Unless you're going, I think, to like a Landmark or a Beacon, they're going to focus more on academic support than social support. Even when they have a program maybe specifically for autistic kids, we found a lot of times it's not doing the social skills support as much as kids might benefit from. That is my fire hose of what you might want to know from a parent's point of view because I really want to make sure we have plenty of time to listen to the students. I should also say, if you have any questions while we transition over to our time with the students, please put them in the chat. We will address some of the questions we can here today; we also will collect those and address what we can't in the follow-up email. I'm just so excited to introduce you today to Daniel and Talia, who are students at Landmark College. We have a few questions we're going to ask them to answer, and then open it up for you guys to ask any of us any questions, but first, I'm going to start with Daniel and just ask you to tell us a little bit about yourself and what your college journey was like. Daniel Cabaniss: Sure. Hi, everybody. My name is Daniel Cabaniss, and I am a senior at Landmark College. I am also a campus ambassador, as is Talia. My experience—first of all, in the case of self-disclosing—I have ADHD, and I also have a visual processing disorder. I'm a student who was diagnosed relatively late. I was diagnosed at 14 or 15, and I was really in denial about my need for accommodations and my need for a school that was in any way different from that of my peers. I thought that I could basically just power through college the same way I was sort of powering through high school. That ended up, of course, not being correct, but that was that was my my thought process coming in. My experience with the college application process itself was really one of going to the guidance counselor at my high school. First of all, the high school counselor being very interested in school ranking and giving me colleges based on school ranking—which, you know, that is definitely a way to tell how good a college is in certain aspects, but it wasn't extremely helpful for me. Then also being told, "Oh, here—here are a few things you as a student are not so great at multitasking; here's a school where they take one class at a time," which is Colorado College—the my first school that I ended up going to. Basically, sort of being railroaded a little bit into that direction without considering some of the other things that were most important to me. If I could go back and ask myself questions—put being put into that college counselor role—I would ask myself the question, "What is the class that you appreciate the most, that you feel the most safe in, you feel like you learn the best in, and what are the things that make that class that way?" Sort of helping to elucidate sort of the real—the real reasons, the real things that make me feel held and put me in an advantageous position to learn. Callie Turk: I think that's a pretty succinct way of starting off. That's awesome. Thank you so much. Talia, would you mind answering that same question? Talia Katz: Yes. Well, Daniel did so great that it's hard to top that, but I'm Talia. I'm a junior at Landmark. I have ADHD as well and anxiety. I was diagnosed when I was 19, so after I had already begun college. I was also at a fairly competitive school—I'm from Long Island, and we're not as bad as California, but we come close to you guys—no offense. The college application process was brought up like the first day of high school. I was one of those students who would just power through. I signed myself up for everything, and I did as much work as I could, but there's there was always things dropping off. I kind of had the mindset that that would stop in college. Unfortunately, the way we did it—because of the competitive school, the goal was like to go to the hardest school you could get into. So, I went to my guidance counselor, but I also had a like a separate college counselor, and we visited all the schools. I determined that the hardest school I could go to was the University of Chicago, so I early decision there. The only good thing about that was that I didn't have to write a million essays because if I had to sit at that kitchen table with my parents for much longer, I don't know if any of us would have made it. That was a rough experience. I went there, and it wasn't the right fit for me. So, I would say my my biggest thing is: Don't go to the hardest school you can get into. The idea of a "warm hug" kind of school sounds lovely and is definitely kind of the experience at Landmark now, but there are other schools that you can get that at. To find that, you might want to visit schools in the winter and kind of see what the atmosphere of the "warm hug" is because Chicago is very cold; Vermont is also cold—less cold. That's important. Callie Turk: Yes, I have a daughter in Minnesota, and in the 40s there today, and it's balmy, so I hear what you say—that is how we feel. Daniel, we had talked about maybe you just sharing a little bit about like what questions you wish your college counselor had asked you in the process. Daniel Cabaniss: Yeah, absolutely. I mentioned earlier about talking about what makes you feel like you're in sort of the best place for you in your academic life. I think that's a really important question to ask—just the simple like, "Who's your favorite teacher? What was your favorite class? Why?" Getting myself—or getting a student—to really understand and grok, like, not just that the class was great but break it up in individual pieces and figure out the the, "Oh, yes, this thing in particular—the small class sizes was why," or "The teacher had a lot of one-on-one time with me, and that's why," or something like that. I think another thing that is really important is—I really wish I was asked more about what my interests were and sort of, "What are the things that, when I am struggling with executive function skills or things of that nature, what are the things that are in my mind that keep me going?" For me, that's chorus and a cappella. I held on at my first school for two and a half—almost three years—despite all of my challenges and never going to get academic support even though I really should have because I was running an a cappella group and knew that people really relied on me. I knew that if I failed out, then I was going to have to explain to a bunch of people—like, all my friends—why I couldn't run this thing anymore. Really sticking with, "What are those things that you are so passionate about that they will sort of propel you through your college experience?" I think those are really important. I think that those can be sort of a starting point for figuring out what college is right for your students. Callie Turk: I love that, too, because like there's a lot of research that shows, too, when people who maybe have executive function challenges are doing things in their area of interest or passion, they actually are practicing more of those executive function skills and making more social connections. I love that idea of that accountability to other people that's like baked into to what you're doing—that's awesome. Now, I want to hear you sing, but we won't ask you to do that today. Talia, how did you evaluate Landmark and other schools? And so, what's some of the important information to look for when you're evaluating, and what do you wish you looked for—because it's so overwhelming? Talia Katz: Definitely it's very overwhelming, and though, so there are things you can find on like college websites that you might not think you'd be able to find. Like how supportive is the academic support center? And for that you're going to want to look at like how many people are working there. Are they all peer tutors? What's their experience like? Do they have experience working with neurodivergent students, or were they just former English teachers? Both are great, but that serves a different purpose. How connected is the academic support to Disability Services? Disability Services is very understaffed at so many schools. And while it's great—yes, you go as soon as you get there, you get that support—they're not going to, at a lot of places, they're not going to stick with you through your career there. They're going to tell you, "Okay, this is what you're getting. This is how much extra time you get. This is how you'll tell your professors." And that's our whole job. Some schools have that more connected with academic support. So like some schools will do part of those executive functioning tasks for you, and that's kind of what you like, just because it's such an overwhelming experience to walk into a new place and have all these systems to get to know. The more connected the school has it, the better. And so you can kind of see like what's linked on their website, whose pictures do they have, can I contact this person? And like you can always call the school and ask to talk to a student. And then the more you talk to the student, the more you can be like, "So what is that really like? What is that really like?" A good way that I've done that in the past is going to the school itself, if you can travel to the school, and like having lunch in the dining hall, and going up to random students. Can be tough—you can have your mom do it! And students really don't mind. It's kind of nice. They never really—you never really get to talk and tell the real story. So it's very—it's exciting for everybody. Yeah, yeah. And to Daniel's point, too—talking about like what you want your life to look like. What are the important things to you? Like what are your values? And if your value is going outside, that is a value. Like, what are things that you don't like living without? Callie Turk: Yeah, that's so—that's so great. And I know that, you know, you looked at a school, a couple schools, and that's really helpful. Like you said, like my daughter, like being somewhere where it was not sunny and not having to go outside was a high value. And that's different than a lot of kids. So I think not assuming, too, everybody wants the same thing is really helpful. So Daniel, what advice do you have for students with learning differences as they start their college search? So like advice that you have for those students that college counselors can pass along? Daniel Cabaniss: Yeah. Don't—don't do what I did. I think really, my advice for students—and I know this can be tough, because there are certain times when things have to start, right? When you know, like getting into junior year and SATs, ACTs, all that sort of stuff. But starting to think about it early, so that there is no rush. I know that I certainly—I felt rushed in many ways. And so because of that rush, I felt pressured into making a decision and convincing myself that I liked that decision. And that is a—that's sort of a bad cycle to get into. So thinking about it early, giving yourself plenty of time, and really not getting married to any school. There's no need to have any loyalty to a school that you like. That's something that I sort of, in my second college search, really understood, is—you know, to a certain extent: what can you give me? Right? I'm not just applying, I'm not just sort of submitting to this higher power. It's: I'm a person who has a specific learning style and specific needs. These are things that I want. Do you have them? And are you going to be nice to me about it? And if not, then bye-bye. Sort of confirming that self-worth and value. College students—you know, these prospective college students—yeah, we've got value. And sometimes it feels hard to accept that when you're in high school, but this can be sort of part of that. Callie Turk: Definitely, definitely. And you know, I haven't gotten any questions yet in from our people who are attending. If anyone wants to put a question in the chat, feel free. But I thought there was a really good one that came in as part of the pre-submitted questions that you all might be great to answer, which is: Just how do we think about balancing, you know, as a—when we're like, as the parents or the college counselors working with students who are neurodivergent—how do you all suggest we balance empowering students to have control over the process versus helping them with their executive function skills? So I think this is a common tension point, right? Yeah, and I'm not sure any family ever gets it quite right. But as a college counselor, like how could they help kind of create that balance? Talia Katz: I can answer that, and then Daniel, if you have anything to add, please. So basically, just—it’s hard. But don't assume that you'll suddenly be good at things. Like it's nice to imagine that you'll go to sleep one day after procrastinating and in the morning you'll be able to do stuff. And everyone has that experience—neurotypical and neurodiverse. And the same goes for like letting parents help their students. Like there are weaknesses that we have, and focusing on those is just going to make the whole experience a lot harder. And like it's—so all the like organizing things, the keeping track of deadlines, the adult things—making appointments, stuff like that. As long as you're in communication with your student like, "Hey, I just did this thing. I did this thing. Look, here that thing is." It's like when you're training someone, and so you copy them on all your emails. Pretend like you're training someone new. And yeah, it is—it's hard as a student still to let my parents help with stuff. But like you make that spreadsheet for them and then you're like, "Oh, why don't you answer this question?" Or like, "Which question would you like to answer for this week?" A lot of executive functioning is breaking things down. So like, if you can break things down already for them, that's really helpful. Hopefully every student is different. But there's also a lot—a lot of emotional tax that comes with all this. So the less like—and this isn't something me or my parents are ever successful at—but the less we put our emotions on each other, the better we feel. Then we're like, "This is hard for me, but I'm not putting—" like, say the words out loud that you don't want them to think. Callie Turk: Yes, yeah. Co-regulation. Yes, together. Daniel Cabaniss: Yes. I'll just add on something really quickly as well, which is that, you know, we're talking about these students who are twice exceptional. And so that means that there are places everywhere where they are exceptional—right? And those strengths, either strengths or passions, you know—what's something that's really important, that they're really excited about? And finding that, and then letting them take charge of that—of that aspect of the college process. And the way that I have really improved my executive functioning skills is around those periods, those areas of passion or strength. And then realizing, "Oh, I need a foundation to support that." And so, yeah, you know, splitting up, right? To a certain extent letting them take those aspects. Taking—as parents or as counselors—taking control of the other aspects. And then as they sort of understand, "Oh, this is connected to that," including them in more. Callie Turk: And Sandra, I think you might have wanted to weigh in on this question as well. You can have the last word as we wrap up. Sandra Fishler: Ah, I was—quite frankly, I was so enraptured in what both of you shared. I think finding the balance and exactly that is so hard. Leaning into your strengths is so important. And I love that, Daniel—you're right, it's not just interests, it's passions. Right? Taking that and leveraging it, leaning into it, saying, "What would work best for me?" And really, like, without being dazzled by going to the hardest school, as Talia was mentioning, or going to this school that everybody thinks is so cool and we've got to go there—or maybe a family member went to a particular school, and so you feel compelled that you have to go. Kind of setting aside all of that outside noise and really leaning into your strengths and what you are passionate about and interested in, I think is a way to find the most balance. And of course, scaffolding and breaking down those tasks is essential. Callie Turk: Yeah. And we're gonna wrap up here because it's exactly 2:30. And I really just appreciate all of the wisdom and insights that all three of you shared today. I hope everyone here walks away with this belief that neurodivergent kids can be successful in the college application process—as long as we are reminding them to take joy along the way, and we are seeing it as a learning experience for everyone. And scaffolding and partnering and collaborating between parents, students, and their counselors—it can really be an affirming process. And kids can learn a lot about themselves and feel good about the decisions they're making at the end of the day that are going to impact the rest of their lives. So thank you all for coming, for the important work that you're doing to support neurodivergent kids in reaching their goals and dreams, and to our three speakers today for just sharing so much of yourselves and your experiences with us. Have a great day. Thank you.

Updated March 2025 with feedback from our community! It’s Winter in the Bay Area - cold weather, dark evenings, and rain. It’s also the time to start planning your child’s summer! Regardless of what path you choose for your 2e kids this summer, remember to focus on their strengths and interests - this is a time for them to explore and grow in ways that the school year often can’t afford. Often, students don’t get to spend time on their strengths and interests during the school year, so summer is a great opportunity to do just that. Camps, internships, mentorships, and independent projects are all great options. Finding camps which can support your twice-exceptional (2e) and neurodivergent (ND) child - while also fitting into your commute and your other summer plans - can often be extra-challenging. We’ve gathered this list of camps that have been recommended and/or researched by our REEL parent community. We hope this list is a helpful starting point for you as you consider summer camps for your 2e children. (Please note, though, that REEL does not endorse any camps and is not responsible for any individual’s experience. Have a camp you think we should add? Please reach out to hello@reel2e.org .) SILICON VALLEY ND FRIENDLY DAY CAMPS Athena Academy Summer (Palo Alto) & Charles Armstrong Summer (Belmont) https://athenaacademy.org/summer-camp/ https://www.charlesarmstrong.org/admissions/summer-school “Both of these schools run fun summer camps for dyslexic students.” - A.K. Beacon Wellness Camps (Sunnyvale) https://www.beaconwellnessteam.com/groups-and-camps This camp provides a supportive, collaborative environment where individuals can connect with others facing similar challenges, gain new perspectives, and grow together. Camps are offered on a variety of topics including building social skills through fantasy and games, cognitive flexibility & perfectionism, and mindfulness through art. Beyond the Box Learning (Palo Alto, Sunnyvale, and more) https://www.beyondtheboxlearning.com/classes/ "One of Beyond the Box's summer camps was our introduction to writing with Royd and Shu-Hsien. He's taken several classes with them since then." - S.T. CHC: Sand Hill School Summer (Palo Alto) sandhillschool.org/summer/ Sand Hill Summer is designed for children who face challenges in reading, writing, spelling, or mathematics during the school year. Children with dyslexia, ADHD, language-based learning disabilities, or other specific learning disabilities will experience success in a supportive, skill-building environment. Our program balances fun activities tailored to students' interests with evidence-based academic support. (For kids entering grades 2-8.)   CHC: S.P.O.T. Summer (Palo Alto) chconline.org/spot S.P.O.T. gives your child the gifts of feeling understood, making friends, and having fun, while developing skills to help prepare them for their best school year yet! Led by a speech language pathologist and occupational therapist, your child will develop social, emotional, sensory regulation, and communication skills   through art, science, nature, and wonder. (Ages 5-9) City of Palo Alto Summer Camps (Bay Camp, Zoo Camp, MakeX, many more) https://www.cityofpaloalto.org/Departments/Community-Services/CSD-Service-Pages/Register-for-Activities-Classes “My kids loved the small groups and immersive, hands-on activities at all of the science camps. An instructor and several helpers provide plenty of support. They get to delve deeply into their passion areas. I’ve also heard great things about the art and drama, etc camps but haven’t tried them yet.” - Y.V. "Palo Alto Zoo science camp was great for my kindergartener. Shoutout to Jennifer who was running the camp classes and she was an amazing leader and super inclusive, informed, and kind and respectful to my 2e and non-2e boys." Curiodyssey Summer Camp (San Mateo) https://curiodyssey.org/learn-explore/summer-camps-overview " Before the camp started, they hosted an information night on Zoom meeting, providing a lot of information to parents. They also reached out to parents who identified their kids with special needs during the registration process. At the drop off on the first day, I saw the camp teacher printed out my email with their own comments to get fully prepared. They have daily check in with me at pickup and sincerely take my suggestions on how to work with my son. On the last day of the camp, the kiddos had great presentations with their own made posters." - C.Z. Decathlon Sports Club (Woodside and Los Altos) https://www.decathlonsportsclub.com/ “We’ve had a lot of luck with Decathlon Sports Camp for my high energy ADHDer. They are a long running family run camp with a high camper-to-counselor ratio. They’ve been especially high-touch with my family’s extra needs in the last few years, going the extra mile to make sure my kids are matched with loving experienced counselors and checking in frequently with me for feedback.” - C.P. FANWAR LARP Camp (Palo Alto) https://www.fanwar.com/ Ed note: This camp runs weekly throughout the year as well. "This is the camp for all kids who love to LARP and role-play. It's Dungeons & Dragons brought to life. My son and his friends can't get enough." - A.K. ID Tech (Stanford and various other locations) https://www.idtech.com/ Ed note: Check out their sleepaway options as well! "My son LOVED his three one-week sessions at ID Tech this summer. Completely rocked it. Seeing the other kids there, I'd say at least half of the ones in his classes seemed to be on the spectrum so the instructors must be used to it." - L.L. "My 2e son had a fabulous time during his week of coding camp. He really seemed to be with 'his people' and would come home and code for hours after camp ended." - A.K. "My son attended the Stanford location of ID Tech for the first time this summer. It was a week term. It was a solid experience in terms of being able to communicate his needs ahead of time. His counselor seemed really engaged. I found the lunch buffet in the cafeteria and access to a marketplace a great way to help my son experience more independence (e.g. deciding what he eats, and budgeting his allowance) with some scaffolding in place." - S.T. Galileo (Bay Area, Southern CA, Chicago, Denver, Seattle) https://galileo-camps.com/ “Very hands-on camp with different themes each week. Art, science, and active sections daily. Non-competitive. Emphasizes creativity and experimentation. High quality counselors and helpers. Good ratio. There is a rah-rah portion in the morning that may not be suitable for all kids. Allowed us to bring an aide.” - Y.V. "My kids like Galileo Summer Quest. Choice has been key for my kid doing well at camp, and Galileo let them pick their own area (ex. my kid wanted to learn to sew)." - D.W. Great Book Summer (Stanford, multiple locations) https://greatbookssummer.com "My rising 10th grader attended the residential program at Stanford University and had a fantastic experience. They offer programs across the U.S. and abroad. They offer both day and residential programs. If your teen wants to try a residential program, in a lower-stakes way (no need to leave the Bay Area), and loves either writing or reading, I cannot recommend the Stanford program enough. I bet their other locations are also fabulous." -L.D. "My child did the Great Books program the summer between 6th and 7th grade and it was *transformative.* It was definitely what convinced them that they wanted to be doing that level of reading and analysis year round, and that they would be fine going away to boarding school (which they did!). I high recommend it as well." - K.Z. Jefunira (Stanford) https://jefuniracamp.com/ “Activities are fun, creative, and mostly non-competitive games. They are more flexible than most camps - they want kids to try everything, but if a kid really doesn’t want to do something after trying it, they will usually accommodate.” - L.L. Kidizens (Los Altos) https://kidizens.com/ "My son has asked to return to this camp several times now over the past few years with him also attending its past summer camps and a spring break camp. I especially found the lead counselor, Donald, this past summer to be inclusive and engaging." - S.T. Maker Nexus (Sunnyvale) https://www.makernexus.com/youth-programs “Wide variety of maker space camps including woodworking, metalworking, 3D printing, D&D, Arduino, and more. Small groups with an instructor and helper provide plenty of support. Amazing equipment and freedom to be creative.” - Y.V. Marine Science Institute (Redwood City) https://www.sfbaymsi.org/summer-marine-science-camp “My 2e and gifted children loved this science camp when they were in elementary school. The staff is friendly and overall the camp feels relaxed.” - A.K. "After the first day, the camp director identified my son's needs. After checking with me, she immediately took action and assigned experienced staff members to work with my son and provided him the breaks he needed. This is the first time he finished the camp without getting kicked out. It means so much to him. I am so grateful!" - C.Z. Movement formerly Planet Granite (Sunnyvale) https://movementgyms.com/sunnyvale/climbing/youth-programs/ "My 12 y/o has participated in their summer and spring camps for the past 5 years. He's progressed and pushed himself to climb higher and attempt challenging routes. He takes a book to read when he wants some down time during the half day sessions. It's one of the few camps he asks to attend every summer." - S.T. RPG Mystery Quest Field Days (Oakland) https://www.gamescapecenter.org/camp Ed note: This camp is run by Doug Ronning, a past REEL speaker. REEL parents have participated in his past online D&D groups and highly recommend his programs! A l ive Action Role-Play camp designed using a neurodiversity-affirmative approach.   School of Rock (various locations) https://www.schoolofrock.com/ Stanbridge Academy Summer Camps (San Mateo) https://www.stanbridgeacademy.org/afterschool--summer-school.html "My 2e son thrived in this environment without incident. And made FRIENDS!!!! It is a major relief to me to know he's in a safe and supportive environment." Steve and Kate's Camp (Various Bay Area locations) https://steveandkatescamp.com/ "Steve and Kate's lets each camper decide exactly which activities they want to do. It was a good fit when my kids were young. However Steve and Kate's only works if they pick a site with outdoor space. A few summers it was great - for instance at Encinal School, with all the classrooms and outdoor space. I'd say learning what the location looks like is very important, in addition to the content itself!" - D.W. "Steve and Kate's camp in Walnut Creek has been great with our kiddo. He is also 11 years old, and he gets bored and overwhelmed easily. The camp allows him to select his activities and the days he wants to come. They have made a huge effort to understand our kiddo and make his experience a good one." - D.P. TechKnowHow (Various Bay Area locations) https://www.techknowhowkids.com “Great camp for tinkerers, budding engineers, and LEGO lovers! Counselors were able to work with my son even though he needed extra support reading some of the instructions.” - A.K. Tinkering Camp (Half Moon Bay / San Francisco / San Rafael) Ed note: In past years there has been a sleepaway camp option; the overnight camp is unfortunately not happening in summer 2023, but the day camps are running. https://www.tinkeringschool.com/day-camp-san-francisco “Tinkering Camp is the summer program of Brightworks School. It is an amazing hands-on building camp which my 2e son has loved for many years.” - A.K. "This camp has lots of 2E kids, and more of an even gender balance than other science/builder/coding camps we've tried." - M.K. Tribal Wisdom Academy (Los Gatos) https://www.tribalwisdomacademy.com/ “I learned about this camp on a Facebook group for Bay Area ND and gifted kids. My kids totally loved it! The husband and wife couple who run it are great.” - A.K. Wheelkids (Palo Alto, plus other locations) https://wheelkids.com/ “Good quality counselors and programs, worked well with our ND kids.” - L.L. Young Actors Theatre Camp (Santa Cruz) https://www.campyatc.com/ "I learned about this amazing camp that’s great for 2e and is highly inclusive - one kid grew from just watching to meeting industry experts and singing and performing abroad etc!" - Y.V. ND FRIENDLY SLEEPAWAY CAMPS Akeela (Vermont) https://campakeela.com/ “Where quirky campers thrive. Akeela campers are boys and girls completing grades 3 – 10 who are excited about a camp experience that supports their social growth. Many have been diagnosed with Asperger’s, NVLD or a similar neurodiverse profile. At Akeela, they truly belong and find lifelong friends.” - Akeela website “Big property in Vermont with a lake. Co-ed. More for ‘rule followers’ - do not want to deal with refusals or oppositional behaviors. 3 periods in the morning of preselected activities, then each week they choose what they want to do for the other 2 periods in the afternoon.” - L.L. “As the kids age, they can check out ‘Beyond Akeela’, which aims to prepare them with the life skills they need to live independently and/or on a college campus. We haven’t gone ourselves but have heard good things.” - C.T. Altitude (Santa Clara) https://viaservices.org/services/altitude/altitude-summer/ Ed note: This camp also seems to have a day camp option. “Altitude provides year-round camping experiences for participants entering 6th through 12th grade with social cognitive challenges including: verbal and nonverbal learning disabilities, ADHD, Asperger’s, and high functioning autism. We build social skills, independence, and self-confidence to prepare our participants for the transition to young adulthood, future relationships, and the rest of their lives.” - Altitude website “This is an outdoorsy, swimming, hiking, crafting camp. You can do an intake interview with the person who runs the program, and she will answer all of your questions so you can weigh whether it would be a good fit for your kiddo. The woman I talked to did know the term 2e and seemed to really want the camp to be a place that would work for my daughter. We didn’t end up going, but it may be worth looking into if you’re looking to try out a camp experience that isn’t too far from home, since it’s right here in Silicon Valley.” - C.T. Camp Sequoia (Pennsylvania) https://www.camp-sequoia.com/ “Camp Sequoia is a supportive overnight camp for exceptional young men ages 7-17 and exceptional young women ages 10-16, focusing on the unique needs of boys with ADHD and those working on social or life development skills.” - Camp Sequoia website “My son who has ADHD and social anxiety went to Camp Sequoia. He was 17 at the time but it was the best experience of his life and I only wish I had discovered it when he was younger. The director, Brian Lux, understands 2e kids.” - C.E. Hidden Villa (Los Altos Hills) https://www.hiddenvilla.org/programs/summer-camps/region-HV/ Ed note: This program has day camps too! "My son had a successful time at the Hidden Villa Residential (sleepaway) camp. They really do aim to be inclusive. They didn’t schedule a call with us beforehand per se, but I took the initiative to call the director and he really listened. At dropoff I could see they had printed all the forms and the counselors had really read them and were already familiar with everything I mentioned. Although the camp is mostly group-activities rather than individual-choice-activities, they allowed my son to opt out of things he didn't want to do - for example, he played cards most days instead of swimming. They seemed really flexible. Whatever they did, it worked for him and he had a good time there." - L.L. Summit Camp (Pennsylvania) https://summitcamp.com Ed note: We heard from our community that this is an outdoor camp that may accept neurodivergent kids. We're not sure, but it might be worth checking out. “Sleepaway Summer Camp for youth that have social and emotional learning challenges, any age from 8 years to 21 years.” - Summit Camp website Talisman (North Carolina) https://talismancamps.com/ “We provide specialized camp experiences for young people ages 6 to 22 with autism spectrum disorders, ADHD and/or other learning differences.” - Talisman website “This camp has a large variety of programs, for ADHD and autism (or both). The programs range from 1-4 weeks. They can deal with some refusals/oppositional behaviors as long as the child does pose a safety concern to themselves or others.” - L.L. Timbertop (Wisconsin) https://www.timbertopcamp.org/ “Timbertop Camp for youth with learning disabilities and special needs is a Wisconsin overnight summer camp designed for kids that think and learn differently. Youth campers have been identified by their School District as needing extra help for a learning disability or special need. Specific learning disabilities or special needs may include: OHI, ADHD, ADD, LD, SLD and Dyslexia.” - Timbertop website “Extensive intake process. Can deal with behaviors except for elopement. Structured activities in the morning, free afternoons at the lake. Farm animals!” - L.L. Yunasa (Michigan and Colorado) https://educationaladvancement.org/programs/yunasa/about-yunasa/ Designed and led by eminent experts in the field of gifted youth, Yunasa embraces gifted children for who they are, helping them understand and work with the unique joys and challenges that gifted children face. Geared toward the unique needs of gifted children, while offering all the enjoyment of a traditional summer sleep-away camp, Yunasa provides a combination of traditional camp activities and special workshops designed specifically to help gifted children learn more about themselves as they develop greater awareness and self-acceptance. The week-long camp is held in Colorado in June and Michigan in July. 2E-SPECIFIC PROGRAMS Bridges Academy Summer Ed note: Bridges Academy does not yet have its 2023 summer program offerings available. To get a sense of what they offer, you can view last year’s courses here: https://2ecenter.org/product-category/summer-2022/ “Bridges Academy is a LA-based 4th-12th grade school for 2e learners. They run a summer program as well, which is offered both online and in person at their campus in Studio City, CA. My 2e son loved the Dungeons & Dragons class he took online in this program during the height of COVID, and my gifted son enjoyed a debate class online that year as well. The teachers all understand gifted and 2e kids and the environment is supportive and fun.” - A.K. Young Scholars Academy https://youngscholarsacademy.org/ “Young Scholars Academy is an online enrichment program for 2e kids. They have classes for kids all year around, including summer. My son is currently enrolled in an after school ‘wacky history’ class, which is one of his interests. This is a great community of like-minded families and 2e kids, but they have to enjoy meeting virtually, something which can sometimes be challenging for some of our 2e kids (mine especially!)” - A.K. Crescanova https://www.cresconova.org/ “Crescanova is a new nonprofit organization that runs online programs for gifted elementary school aged students, including course options over the summer. They have worked with 2e learners, too!” - C.T. PRE-COLLEGE PROGRAM CONSIDERATIONS A plethora of pre-college programs for high schoolers exists on college campuses. Examples include UC’s Cosmos Program , Emory’s Pre-College Program , and University of Connecticut’s Pre-College Summer - but these are just a few among many (including Brown University, Stanford Summer Humanities Institute, Columbia University, Washington University, Loyola Marymount - there are so many!). The programs on college campuses are either offered directly by the college or by other organizations who host programs or camps on college campuses (such as Johns Hopkins CTY , Great Books , iDTech and Summer Springboard ). While none of these options appear to be directly geared toward 2e kids, these programs provide the opportunity for a high schooler to go very deep in an interest area while having the chance to live on a college campus. A few key questions to consider when looking at these programs: What accommodations in the learning and residential program might they make? Will teachers be flexible in allowing students to use the supports that help them to learn and participate (i.e., a quiet space to work, headphones, movement breaks, etc.)? Are they run by the college or an outside company? Either way, does the organization running the program have experience with neurodivergent students? Does the schedule allow for downtime? Can students opt out of extracurricular or social activities if desired? How many kids will be involved in this program at any given time? How many students will be in each class? What is the instruction to student ratio? What are the dining options? How are food allergies accommodated? What options do they provide for vegetarians, vegans, etc.? What weekend activities are required? Can a child stay on campus rather than participate in a weekend activity, if they prefer? What is the adult supervision in that case? For our older kids, summer can be a great time to volunteer and get involved in the community, or try out a part-time job. And, don’t forget the importance of balancing everything with what works for your family in terms of downtime, rest, family time, and fun. Summer can be both a special time and it can also be stressful, without some of the routines and structures of daily life. As always, we hope you find what works best for your kids and your family!