Motivation Cycle for Neurodivergent Kids
- Teresa Nair
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
Read the transcript here
0:02 Hi everyone, I'm Teresa from REEL. Thank you for being here. In this short video, I want to introduce a simple and powerful idea we use in the motivation small group discussions. It's the idea of motivation as a cycle.
0:16 Most of us know motivation as getting something done, homework, chores, getting out the door, ready for school. But what if motivation is actually bigger? It's the long-term why behind what we're doing. Things like, I'm motivated to get my engineering degree. I'm motivated to get to school on time. I'm motivated to memorize the entire periodic table.
0:40 Those big motivations matter, but the steps that get us there look very different, especially for neurodivergent kids. And that's where motivation as a cycle helps. In our workshops, we break motivation into four parts. Sparks, flow, recovery, feedback. And surrounding the whole cycle are blockers.
1:04 In this cycle, it gives us an opportunity under to understand what's really happening. So instead of relying on willpower or pressure, we learn what actually helps neurodivergent brains begin, continue, and reset.
1:22 A spark is anything that helps activate the brain so we can begin a task or continue again. It could be interest, novelty, humor, movement, music, autonomy. One example we like to use is a shower playlist. For some kids, showers are overwhelming, boring, or just plain hard to initiate.
1:45 But playlists of their favorite songs to sing in the shower can be great and change the whole experience. It offers just enough activation to get things going to support movement and the motivation to get it done. That's what a spark does. And you will probably need to use sparks throughout your pursuit of your goal and what you're motivated to do.
2:13 It shifts the starting point and it begins to encourage exploration and empowerment.
2:22 Blockers are things that make starting hard or continuing hard. They can include uncertainty, sensory overload, boredom, low dopamine, missing skills, and for neurode divergent kids, blockers can show up quickly and intensely. For example, urgency might help in the morning when energy is high, but at night, the same urgency can increase stress and shut everything down. So, we identify that at night, urgency is a blocker. Same tool, different moment, very different outcomes.
3:02 Understanding blockers help us redesign the situation so that the child can actually access their motivation. And as parents, caregivers, and teachers, we can help our kids begin to understand their blockers and share ideas with what to do with that information. I know even for me as an adult, I'm learning and identifying a lifetime worth of blockers and sparks that are already there, but now I know how to see them in a different light.
3:35 Neurodivergent kids often rely on different activation systems. They don't respond to because I said so or because it's important. They respond to interest, meaning, novelty or connection.
3:52 When we understand that, everything shifts. We stop labeling kids as unmotivated. We start seeing how their system works and we build strategies that fit the way they think and feel. That's at the heart of a neuroaffirming approach.
4:11 Once you begin noticing sparks and blockers, we can walk through it as a cycle. Try a spark. See what happens if you move into flow. Offer time for recovery when needed. and take a moment to reflect on what worked and what didn't. And if it didn't work, that's fine. It's not a failure. It's data. It's information that helps us get it right or better the next time. So that over time, this becomes a flexible, adaptable practice with a simple, common language for both parents and kids.
4:50 What do you think might be blocking you here? We tried this spark last time. Do you think it might be helpful here?
5:00 In another video, we explore how to identify sparks and blockers with your kids. And if you'd like to go deeper, our facilitated small group discussions, offer a supportive place to learn, reflect, and connect with other parents, or join our online community, or comment here. I am motivated to learn more from you and your family's experiences. And as always, contact your child's doctors or therapists when needed. Thank you for being here. You're not alone on this journey.
